See, I DO want to write every day…

ttocsland
February 13th, 2004
Current Mood: okay
Current Music:not u2, oddly enough…
As for the potential ‘signs of the apocalypse’ comment from the other day, dave – let me help you remember this past fall: san diego county burns, LA county smolders, we elect ‘Mr. Freeze’ as our governor, and a freak hail storm dumps 6 inches of snow/slush/hail in C O M P T O N !!!!!!

Apocalypse? I’d WELCOME the apocalypse, sir. Yes I would…

so, i continue to push music, burning them off onto cds – all neat and orderly. did i finish ‘will unplugged’ for vetic? no… update and push my resume to brettster? no… paint kiosks, set up shelves, create a killer powerpoint portfolio? uh… no. truly, a lost thursday. I did read a bit, and watch some tv. and cuddle with the pups – canela especially as we watched CSI.

and I did write a bit – just a bit. odd feeling today, along the path of how canela will occasionally just stop mid stride on her walk… one leg up – odd/confused look on her face – just for a moment, long enough for me to notice the tug at the leash, and stop and look back at her… as if she had forgotten what she was gonna do next. EEEk – i’ve heard of looking like your pets – bad enough, eh? – but acting like them? hmmm….

just two more little entries tonight, and then I call it the end:
1) mattman – rock the fuck on with your bad ass self – secure what is truly and richly deserved. I do hope the chance to write your own ticket is presented and it’s all that you want.
2)anyone who wants to, I’d dearly love a ride – if not ownership – of a McLaren F1. I know they’re kinda expensive, but I was looking at them today, and they look so damn cool. Just, you know, keep it in mind if you happen to stumble over one kinda cheap, ok? thanks.

and that, dear friends, is the end.
ciao,
s.

Eyes are the windows to our souls…

ttocsland
February 11th, 2004
Current Mood: optimistic
Current Music:U2 – Walk On, video
…MS Windows is the portal to hell! enough on that subject.

Vacation, dear maddening, is what we all need. from this fucked up country, and from some of our fucked up lives. If only we could get paid to evaluate vacations, eh? “the natural hot springs near Bozeman are really the best in america, having a more pleasant scent than the ones in arkansa. If you can only go to one hot springs this year…. blah blah blah”… wonder who contracts THAT gig out!!!

so, i’m soaking in the groovy goodness that U2 always inspires in me. they are a band that has always been around, ever since i stopped listening to Styx and grew up! (ha ha ha ha). Matt had the ‘War’ cassette from his bro John, and we’d listen to sunday bloody sunday on his alpine deck in his 1st rabbit. or was it his civic? who knows… but ever since then they’ve been in/around/near my soul. So, now that I have their DVD ‘go home’ playing, I’m once again realizing how moving I find them. One nice thing about growing out of the period of life where you might find other’s opinions of what you like or dislike disturbing is that I can accept that good or bad musicians, the music was integral to my live in many ways, and at many times!!! Thus, soaking up and feeling … good? powerful? optimistic? – that someone as goofy looking and not particularly ‘great’ with talent as Bono can go forth and change the world. All I need to do is come up with a stunning nickname, I guess…

As I spoke of the other day, doing the mp3 transfer thing. One potentially painful thing is that the ‘id3’ tags for all the tunes I’ve acquired aren’t completely filled in. So my manager program is prompting me to fill in the specifics – title, artist, stuff like that. which is a good thing, since I want to be able to find the music I have. Except when I’m pushing over 500 tracks in a folder, I find the ‘8% transfered’ notice – this being half an hour in – a little annoying! oh well, that’s what I get for embracing cutting edge technology!! er.. a few years late. yeah. that’s what I meant to say…

So, any suggestions as to what to do with this world we’re living in? In the past few days I’ve been chatting with a co-worker who’s from Iran. It’s one of those great periods where we talk about all sorts of things, life, philosophy, stuff like that.
I mentioned to him my frustration – lifelong at that- of ‘our’ (the US’s) inability to use the potential we have. I referred to the ethiopian famine of the 80’s, when the LiveAid thing happened – how I didn’t understand how we didn’t use our power, that of a strong and able military to deliver the food that we were having our farmers not grow. Stuff like that – the half-truths and assumptions (yeah, Ethiopian gov’t would love to have our biggest military cargo planes land with ‘food’! so young I was…)

He speaks of being beat up cause he was in the wrong place at the wrong time. by his gov’t police. he speaks of the religious leaders who can’t be disapproved of – you don’t like him, you therefore don’t like the religion he stands for, therefore you must be beat/killed.

and thus the crux of the issue, eh? as bad as it is here – a faux democracy, where the powers that be are only looking our for themselves as they use the ‘contract with america’ as so much toilet tissue – it’s not all that bad, is it? Though I wish we all had more, and we were all a bit more happy, I guess I have to just hang on to my true belief that we can all get what we want. So, hugs and heartfelt well wishes to everyone, but especially MnMnZ – wow guys, you all certainly love living on the edge, eh? and to MickeyMatt, dude – perhaps NOW is the time to start taking over the world, eh? Maddening – we’ll vacate again soon, and who knows where you’ll end up – we could make it every other weekend, right? Let’s keep our hope, and forgive that Scott dude for writing so much wack!

ciao,
s.

Back Lit Palms… hi-contrast

ttocsland
February 10th, 2004
So. surpirsed? yeah, thought you would be. But you see, I need to write. I need to have the thoughts and Ideas I possess in my brain-box come out. I need to express myself. E-X-P-R-E-S-S myself! or some such nonsense…

too long between posts, while I DO jot down random thoughts and plans and ideas. such as this from earlier today::
9:51pm + 9Feb04 = Monday night.

Hallelujah, here she comes – by U2.
last mp3 I downloaded in 2001.

bad religion’s give you nothing was the first of 2002.
::see, I’m trying to consolidate all my mp3s onto the Nomad Zen I picked up. the idea I’m running after is to have on the Zen my music in folders based on the date I downloaded them. Simple. So, I had to move my tunes from my external hard drive onto my laptop, sort them via date into folders, and then I’ll push them to the Zen. yay…

wow – like thirteen different idea’s just popped into my head – a comment on the joys of personal music when you want it, then something about the U2 video rolling on the tv as I type this – and a big shout out to mi amiga Melissa -who I’m hoping is having a decent enough time as she does the whole housing thing, but fear she is not…

But you don’t really want to hear all that, do ya? Maybe – just maybe – I don’t care much about other people’s wants and needs. Time for scott to take care of scott, don’t you think? push myself. get myself into the output mode, enough of the ‘input’ or put up mode I tend to fall into. When i jotted a few words of truth in a card for my girl, well – I did that cause it’s what I wanted to do. to make her smile.

So here are some of my words. I’m gonna try and do this everyday. wish me luck.

ciao,
s.